Camels in Virginia

The other day while coming home from running some errands, I was sitting in the left hand turn lane and waiting for the green arrow when I realized I was listening to the steady click of the turn signal.

That realization sent me down a rabbit hole of memory, and by the time I pulled into the garage, I was thinking, “Maybe I should write a blog about that,” and now I am.

In the early 2000’s, I kept telling my husband that he needed to stop mumbling. And I had to keep telling him to turn up the volume on the television set. (This was back in the old days when TV sets didn’t have closed captioning.) He told me I probably needed to get hearing aids. I told him I MOST CERTAINLY DID NOT NEED HEARING AIDS.

Then one fateful day in Tucson, we went to dinner with our daughter’s recently acquired in-laws in a noisy, hard surface Mexican restaurant. During the course of the meal, I overheard her father-in-law say something about “camels in Virginia.” I was taken aback, “Really,” I said aloud. “They have camels in Virginia?”

Her father-in-law looked as me as though I had just stepped off the moon and said, “I LEFT MY CAMERA IN VIRGINIA!” I was fitted with my first set of hearing aids shortly thereafter. And on our way home from the audiologist’s office, what was the first sound I noticed? The seemingly very noisy clicking of the turn signals. Turns out I hadn’t heard those for a very long time.

Why was I so reluctant to wear hearing aids? Vanity, I suppose. After all, wasn’t I too young to be wearing hearing aids? I may have been, but my ears weren’t.

And that’s what hearing my blinkers the other day reminded me of—of how reluctant I was to wear hearing aids. It turns out my hearing loss is far worse than Bill’s. And in rooms with hard surfaces it’s sometimes difficult for me to hear even with the hearing aids turn up to full volume. It’s one of the reasons I usually don’t take questions during book signings. I’m concerned that I’ll mishear the question and my answer will be truly bizarre.

But why am I writing this today? I suspect that out there among my blog readership there are people who are finding it necessary to nudge the volume control a little higher than they used to when they’re watching TV. People for whom, when they’re in a group gathering, find themselves missing out on big parts of the conversation.

If you’re that person, I’m writing this for you in order to spare you the humiliation of your very own Camels In Virginia moment. I’m suggesting that you get over yourself. You’re as old as you are, and so are your ears.

And yes, there are hearing aids that are seemingly impossibly expensive. They’re the ones that come with all the bells and whistles and can hook up to your phone. But it’s 2023 at the moment, folks. Just this year it became possible to purchase hearing aids over the counter without having to go through an audiologist. Those are much less expensive, but they do the basic job.

On that note, I’m going to wish you all a HAPPY NEW YEAR. I’ll probably be in bed by the time people are ringing in the new year, and if the guy next door is setting off fireworks, it won’t bother me a bit, because my hearing aids will be on the bathroom counter by then, and I’ll be deaf as a post.

65 thoughts on “Camels in Virginia

  1. I have had more than a few of those “camel” moments – enough that this past Spring, I got a set of hearing aids! What a difference to my life! I can now take part in discussions without the fear of “camel” moments.
    Getting a hearing test is really just part of taking care of your general health. Folks
    should do this to make sure about their hearing as loss can have a huge impact on health!

  2. In this one, you are definitely talking to me. I am in the process of getting my first hearing aid. I don’t mind the volume all the way up on my TV [I live alone], but I hate that I can’t understand what my Granddaughter is saying when she calls me from Seattle every week on her way to work.

  3. Thank you Judy ever so much for this blog! I lost all but 30% of my hearing due to meningitis in first grade. My first hearing aid which I got in 1952 was before transisters. It was the size of 1 1/2 packs of cigarettes. Three batteries had to be replaced every 3 days. I am now on about my 14th or 15th hearing aid and every time I update they are much better. I have seen a BIG change in the number of people who now wear them who wouldn’t be caught dead before. My current one was bought thru my Medicare provider and only cost $399. I included a base station to listen to TV for $200 extra. With it I can turn up the volume for me without touching the TV. I can watch and listen even with the mute engaged.

    • P.S. I forgot to note the 30% is in one ear only. The other ear is totally dead. I have considered a cochlear implant, but at 78 years old I’ll pass. From 2nd through 5th grade I went to a school with deaf and hard of hearing students to learn lip reading. In 1951 it was thought that everyone should read lips and we were forbidden to sign.That has obviously changed many years ago.

      • My friend, who is a piano player and organizes Christmas concerts every year, has lost 80% of her hearing in one ear and is totally deaf in the other. She has just qualified for cochlear implants, but that’s a pretty big deal. Your comment about being able to get hearing aids for $399 (which might be about $600 in Canada) might be an option for her. Thanks for sharing your story.

  4. Good to know that there are over-the-counter hearing aids available. Like after I had cataract surgery, I discovered that I needed about 5 different strengths of reading glasses in order to do my job, but my optometrist told me these are available at the Dollar Store for $1.25. What a relief! I now have a couple of dozen pairs around the house, in pockets, in my car….Next is hearing aids, I’m sure. My sister paid about $5000 for hers, so I wasn’t looking forward to that expense. Hers were very specialized, as she was a music teacher, but so am I, so I hope I can make do with the over-the-counter ones when the time comes!

  5. Excellent advice. It was actually my gastroenterologist who prodded me to get then. All during our briefing, I kept asking the love of my life to translate. His last question was “would you like to go for a hearing test?” At the ripe old age of 63, I was fitted for my hearing aids. They are easy to wear and unobtrusive. I am glad someone finally pushed me to it (and you are absolutely right about turn signals). Happy New Year from Arizona J A Jance!

  6. Your description fits me to a “T”. Thought about learning to lip read. In a crowd, I always hear things lopsided. Must start to research hearing aids that I can afford ( my brother just got a set with all the bells and whistles and he’s almost lost them twice).

  7. Thank you for this memory. My father’s beloved German Shorthaired Pointer saw his hearing aids on his bedside table and gobbled them up. I’m sure it involved a vet bill but the hearing aids were thousands of dollars. I think there is insurance policy you can buy for hearing aids or it might be under your homeowner’s insurance.
    Thank you for the memory. I hope he and his many dogs (fortunately one at a time!) are in heaven reading your blog.

  8. I think it’s very interesting that there’s so much in on newss on AI’s , It’s scary how it’s taken over.

  9. I have a similar problem – need hearing aids but budgeting is an issue. On top of that, I have a specific skin disorder and one site is my ears. I cannot tolerate earbuds or anything in my ears without feeling like I have live cockroaches in my ears!

    However, I am reaching a point of isolation due to the problem so, my New Year’s resolution is to see an audiologist as soon as my husband completes his post-surgical immunology treatments. Thanks for the encouragement.

  10. I got hearing aids when I was 50 (twenty years ago) because I couldn’t hear across the conference table in work meetings. I am so happy that I invested in them! Hearing is wonderful. The Bluetooth connection lets me listen to television without bothering anyone else. Hearing aids keep me connected to the world.

  11. Thanks, Judy, for a very interesting blog. Due to paralysis on the left side of my head, I am almost completely deaf in my left ear, but my right ear is OK. I tried various hearing aids but due to the paralysis, they are very painful and uncomfortable in my left ear. The paralysis also left me with a condition that causes an intense reaction to loud noises, such as public announcements in stores (e.g. Home Depot, Frys, etc. and forget about seeing movies in theaters! They are way too loud for me!) They make me cringe and cause much pain and irritation. I do read lips and use close captioning. Now that they are available OTC, I keep trying various aids in hopes of finding a comfortable and affordable one.
    Wishing you and Bill and your family a happy, healthy, and hope-filled New Year!

  12. Seems my husband mumbles more since he got his hearing aids (lol). I’m waiting to make my appointment until I can walk without a walker and hopefully drive again. A bone marrow transplant from my leg to arm gave me this temporary disability. Hopefully this will be within 6 weeks. Decision is made and I’m ready to hear again. Thanks for sharing your story.

  13. I have worn hearing aids for about eight years. Should have gotten them sooner. It wasn’t so much vanity as cheapness, didn’t want to spend the money. Wasn’t really a surprise that my hearing went south as it runs in my family. Of my four siblings, the one with the best hearing is my youngest brother, the drummer in a rock band. Go figure.

  14. I “hear” you. LOL! Got my first pair of aides about 10 years ago. I still have some issues in noisy areas, so I know what you mean about signings.

  15. I’ve worn hearing aids for 33 years. My type of hearing requires the special ones prescribed by an audiologist. I was lucky to find a very good audiologist back in 1990, and he lets me know when the technology has improved that I will notice a difference.
    The best part of hearing aids is how well I can sleep, through thunder, fireworks and any other noise.
    Thanks for writing this article.

  16. Ha ha, pretty much same story for me. After years on stage playing drums in front of blasting speakers, I finally had to acknowledge hearing loss when I could no longer hear my cats meow. I come to all of your appearances at Third Place Books. I’m the guy that asked if you’re here to see J. A. Jance.

  17. I have a similar hearing situation. I lost most of the hearing in my left ear when I was 27 years old. I didn’t get fitted with hearing aids until I was 74. In the interim before I bit the bullet, my family had many funny stories about what I “thought I heard.” My precious daughter, at age 12, sufferred imbarrasement one day in a department store. We were shopping for school clothes in the late summer and she picked up a shirt she liked. She turned to me and said, “Look, Mom. The seams are inside out.” Except what I heard was, “Look, Mom. A French-fried Owl.” That’s what I said and my daughter claims (to this day) that I literally “screeched” out that phrase, causing her pain and humiliation from a crazy mother. We’ve laughed about it down the years, and sometimes I still don’t understand what somebody said. However, I try to not to “loudly” blurt out what I think I’ve heard!

  18. Dear Judy,
    As someone who works for a hearing aid company, I say THANK YOU for spreading the good word. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. It’s about quality of life. I encourage anyone who thinks they may have a hearing problem to please see your doctor. You’ll be glad you did. Happy New Year!

  19. I can relate! Only yesterday I was with friends at a Mexican restaurant, wearing my hearing aids and the background noise was so loud I could not hear them talking across the table. I removed my hearing aids and could carry on a conversation without asking for to many repeats! And yes when I first got them, I could not believe the different noises in the car, from the turn signals to road noises and wind!

  20. I SO love this post! Luckily I don’t need hearing aids at 70, but you can bet as soon as I do need them, I’ll get them! Thank you for taking away the stigma.

  21. Thank you Judy… for this message. I have been wearing aids for about 10 years now. There have been relatively recent changes in some laws/regulations that allow folks to buy hearing aids w/o seeing a professional…
    I very much enjoy an additional accessory to my aids that allows me to listen to TV directly in my aids. I wanted to be sure you were aware of that availability. I am pretty sure that might not be available on the ‘over the counter’ aids, but it has been well worthwhile for me (thought I have to be careful as I cannot hear my wife as well when TV is coming into my aids)…as I think you said…they do not fix the problem, but they sure do assist. Enjoy this day!!!

  22. Great blog. I’ve wondered how those over the counter hearing aids work.
    Happy New Year to you and Bill.

  23. Dear Judy,
    I shared all those early loss experiences with you and countless others. When I finally went to an audiologist, I was sure I could hear as well as the next person. HaHa. I entered a new (old) world with the hearing aids.

    When one hearing aid got lost while dancing at my younger daughter’s wedding reception, I went to the VA. They fixed me up with all the bells and whistles. My wife is much happier now.

    I suggest all Veterans try the VA even if they have to file a claim.

  24. You nailed it! I was like you and thought my hearing was fine until I took a hearing test. Now I can hear with hearing aids!

  25. Thank you sooooo much for making my day with your ‘Camel’ story! 2023 has been a very frustrating year for me and my high tech hearing aids. So much so, that i was ready to throw them out the window until I remembered how much I had paid for ‘top of the line’! After many frustrating visits/ adjustments.etc. I was greeted on my last visit with new personnel and told that the previous staff was no longer with the company. And I’ve been hearing my turning signal clicking ever since!
    Have a very Happy New Year!

  26. Many years ago, my mother took her father to have his hearing tested, since he had become quite deaf. After the exam, he went to see about hearing aids, and found out how much they cost (even years ago). His response was, “My father was deaf, I’ll be deaf, too!”
    Fortunately for me and those around me, I was much more willing to pay the price about 7 years ago. The aids I got then still work fine, with little in terms of repair. The audiologist provides free batteries and cleaning on a regular basis. Some day these will need to be replaced, but so far, so good.

  27. Yes, I empathize with you and your family greatly. My husband has a severe hearing loss and progressed from hearing aids to now having bilateral cochlear implants. They have made a tremendous difference in his sociability and temperament. I’m very grateful that we could afford them and that he has benefited so much from them.

  28. There are times where I will only catch part of a words, and friends and family will look at me strangely. Almost time to have the ears checked.

    Hope you and yours have a wonderful New Year.

  29. I got hearing aids a couple years ago, but I don’t wear them because the ear buds hurt the cartilage in one ear and itches in the other ear. Plus, the sounds I hear, like you said, are every little thing. It’s very hard to get used to. I hear everything like the dog’s toenails scratching on the wooden floor or the keys clinking around in the ignition of the car, etc., etc. But I’m going to give it another chance and see if I can get smaller ear buds.
    Your blog today was very relatable to many of us. Thanks for posting it!

  30. Judy,
    This year our ski club is celebrating an East Coast New Year, meet at 5:00, dinner at 6:00, watch the ball drop in New York at 9:00 and probably leave for home by 10:00 – a very good plan. I thought you’d appreciate that.

  31. I laughed out loud at the end of your post. I found myself saying “what?” too often so I had my hearing checked. I am 74. So, here I am with hearing aids and appreciate them. And I found that medicare or my BCBS contracts with certain suppliers (for me it was TruHearing). AND mine are rechargeable – NO BATTERIES! I love that feature. My very good HaHa’s (As I call them) were $2K. Husband’s were $6 because we did not know of this offering. So check it out folks. And guess what? My daughter STILL mumbles!!!

  32. I remember when my grandmother’s next door neighbors always knew what she was watching on TV and she was complaining because the volume knob on her tv was broken because it was never loud enough. She never did admit she needed hearing aids. Those were for old people. She lived to be 96. As a consequence my mom got hearing aids around 70, as soon as she really needed them. My dad got his about the same time. I thought I was going to have to get them at around 50, but it turned out to be an earwax issue. So I’ve been spared, temporarily. Both my parents and all my grandparents needed hearing aids. So I know my day will come. For the time being I have to put up with my husband mumbling half the time.

  33. I was told I needed hearing aids last year by my ENT. No one around me thought I needed them, including me. I was told that studies are showing that the two most important things to keep up with are your hearing and your teeth to help prevent or delay the onset of dementia. The only difference I notice is that I now hear the metallic component of light switches and turn signals. I heard them before but not the high frequency sounds.

  34. thank you for fixing my email. I know AI IS intreging. Might as well pass thanks on to anyone when I can. Chuck in tacoma.

  35. Just yesterday, my husband and I were traveling in the car and I heard him say “something” but not sure what. I said “Huh?” and his response was “You didn’t wear your hearing aids today, did you?” Sometimes I either forget or choose not to wear them and get caught wishing I’d put them on. Duh!

  36. OK, Ms J,

    Your blog is excellent, as usual, as far as it goes. But….
    You miss the positive aspects of being hard of hearing, the best one of which is:

    By not having fresh batteries in your HA, or by not wearing it at all, you immediately obtain an infallible, plausible deniability excuse for not hearing, and therefore not complying with, your wifeperson-American’s verbal Honey-Do lists.

    Hee hee. Ignorance is grand.

    Phil Jones
    Olympia

    P.S. My wife is a retired lawyer, and her subsequent written-out HD lists read like court orders….

  37. I was in the same boat. After 4500 hours of flying in C-130s and RC-135s, my hearing loss caught up with me several years ago. The VA provided me with a great set of hearing aids. It’s time to go back for a recheck.

  38. So like you to end the year on a note of comedy. Thanks for a year of sharing your thoughts and your life with us. We’re already looking forward to 2024. Happy New Year to you and Bill.

  39. I charge my hearing aids in my bedroom. The moisture in the bathroom isn’t good for them I was told.

  40. I had to laugh at today’s story, Judy. It reminded me of my Mom who was badly in need of hearing aids, but refused to admit it for a long while. She finally agreed to try “just one aid.” As she came out of the bedroom the first morning after she began wearing that “aid”, she was wide-eyed in amazement. “Have you ever heard your comb go through your hair?” she asked. I responded that I’d never thought about it. “Well listen next time,” she responded. A few days later she called her audiologist and asked for if maybe she could get something to help that other hear hear. From then on there were no secrets kept from Mom! I swear she could hear a pin drop a mile away.

  41. I can definitely understand. I have been in hearing aids for 5 years and am on my 3rd set. Having quite a difficult time on the phone as well as TV. My control or lack there of was making TV a lonesome affaire as my wife has very good hearing, in fact I have commented to her that she could probably hear a feather dropped on the moon. Finally bit the bullet and add money to my insurance and now have aids that blue tooth to my cell, and they have a special program to TV and I am loving life. When on the phone it is like those on the phone with me are right next to me. Before I had numerous camel stories and my children have had quite a few laughs at my expense. You could not pry them from me as it has been life altering.

  42. Me, too! There’s an old joke and just in case you missed it: Three weeks after an older gentleman had received his hearing aids he was visiting his ear doctor who asked him how he liked them? “Just fine”. “How does your family like them?” The older gentleman said “I haven’t told them yet and I’ve changed my will three times.”

  43. I’m afraid can relate!
    I had been told by audiologists for years that I had “Perfect Hearing,” of which I was very proud- Having grown up with a mother who had no hearing in one ear due to having had Scarlet Fever as a young child, I was determined never to be in such a state-
    However, a few years ago my husband became frustrated by my not catching much of what he said-
    I reacted by declaring smugly that I had, “perfect hearing,” as I had been told- Finally, after I misheard something a pharmacist said to me, and stormed out of the place, Carl and I had a fierce argument about the issue- It turned out that in fact I had lost considerable hearing in my right ear, while my left ear was still fine-
    For a while I had virtually NO hearing in my right ear- Recently for some reason I have regained some hearing in that ear- However, clearly I would benefit from a hearing aid on that side to get back to the hearing I once enjoyed- I am not rushing to get one, no doubt out of misguided pride and vanity- However, sooner or later,
    I imagine I will overcome the denial that I am “one of those old people who need
    things like that!”

  44. Boy, this hit home! I got my first hearing aids about 10 years ago and I called my sister one day and said do you know that ice crackles when you pour soda over it? I had never heard that before! I love my ears, and so does my husband!

  45. Oh you gave me such a chuckle! Thank You for sharing this little gem.
    Happy New Year to you and your family.

  46. I love your stories so much. I’m laughing myself silly. It doesn’t matter —I live alone. Thank you for your gift. Keep it coming —spreading joy into the world. May you have a blessed, successful, healthy new year continuing to grow and share your gifts.
    Love ya gal, Jan???

  47. Good topic, & I mostly agree.
    My husband has lost most of his hearing. His hearing aids have bells & whistles, the really useful one being that they convert sounds he can’t hear into sounds he CAN hear. Also, the audiologist can adjust them as his hearing worsens.
    Over-the-counter hearing aids can help many (most?), but for those they don’t help, check out the expensive ones. Insurance paid for half of his, which we did not expect…

  48. I totally understand about hearing àids as I just got new ones and I cañ now hear our minister sermon, watch tv and hear and carry on a decent çonversation.

  49. Thanks for writing this! I had my own Camels in Virginia moment preceding my use of hearing aids. I forwarded this post to my family member in hopes he will opt for a reasonably priced pair sooner rather than waiting to get the pricey option.

  50. I’m retired Navy. I’ve been given great treatment and supplied with hearing aids by the VA for over 20 years. Hearing loss is the most common disability suffered by veterans. I think that means there are untold numbers of us going through “camel” moments day after day. Hats off to JAJ for addressing this issue publicly. I think we each have to fight our own battle in our own way as we navigate our way through life dealing with hearing loss. So, I guess my hope is that more people will realize hearing aids help, even if it takes a while to get used to using them.
    I’m new at reading blogs, but very happy that I tuned in. JAJ’s blogs and the comments are very insightful.
    Jim W

  51. Thank you for putting a smile on my face as I read about you getting Hearing Aids. I just got new ones and they seem better than my first ones. Happy New Year JA Jance!

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