9 O’clock Bum Bum

I believe the above phrase began with my younger brother.  Arlan is a retired Army Colonel now, but as a child he had a unique way with words.  He called our next door neighbor, Mrs. Whiteaker “Dazzo.”  When he got a splinter in his finger, he had “a fiffeo in his fineo.”  (Spell check disapproves of all of those, by the way.)  Arlan is “too young” to remember this but as near as my older sister and I can recall, “Bum Bum” is what he called our mother’s father, Grandpa Anderson, and when Grandpa and Grandma were visiting, nine o’clockwas generally when they came upstairs from their downstairs apartment.

Eventually, nine o’clock bum bum worked its way into the family vernacular, and when the folks issued those words as a command, it meant it was bedtime for everyone.  Before television made its way over the Divide and down the canyons to Warren, Arizona, nine o’clock was pretty much everyone’s bedtime.  Only after the advent of TV did people start staying up for the ten o’clock news and then going to bed at ten fifteen sharp instead of nine.

So now this story is going to segue off in another direction.  (Segue not to be confused with the motorized vehicle, Segway!)  For years, especially in the Beaumont books, I wrote about people having yappy “little dogs.”  (By the way, Spellcheck disapproves of yappy as well.  I have to trick her to keep her from automatically changing it back to “happy.”)  I disapproved of little dogs, you see, because I had big dogs—an Irish wolfhound and two pairs of steady-as-you-go golden retrievers.

And then, because of Bella, we became Dachshund people.  And now we have not one but two yappy little dogs.  There are people out in the yard pruning trees at the moment, and the dogs are barking like crazy.  We have several deliveries set for today, so today is going to be one of those barking mad days, and you know what?  I deserve it.

For years, I told my daughter not to worry if she came home a little late to feed her dogs or if she had to feed them early for some reason.  “Dogs can’t tell time,” I told her with great motherly assurance.  “They won’t notice.”  Like hell!

Jojo, our younger little yappy dog tears up dog beds, but she doesn’t tear up dog toys.  She uses them as a means of communication.  She has one particularly obnoxious squeaky toy, a lobster.  She has learned that if she grabs that and squeezes it like crazy while standing at our feet with reproachful looks aimed in our direction her food will come sooner than later. Mary doesn’t stoop to squeaking, but she’s a master when it comes to reproachful looks.  And when we can’t stand either the looks or that ungodly racket another moment?   Viola!  Like magic dog dishes are deployed and food appears.  For reasons of convenience, the dogs’s evening feeding time slowly was dialed up from five PM to three PM on the dot.  Which is exactly the time when Jojo starts squeaking these days, come hell or high water, daylight savings time or not.  

Due to doggie digestive systems, eating earlier in the afternoon is not a good idea because things tend to, let’s just say, run their course at inconvenient times, (like the middle of the night.)   This is not a good idea if you happen to have another yappy little dog who has to be personally escorted to the door.  (Mary is not a fan of doggy doors.)  As a consequence, we’ve been slowly moving doggy dinner time to later in the evening—4:30 PM.  The problem in making that change is that Jojo still starts squeaking—relentlessly—at 3 PM.

My friend,Alice, had a tiny little dog named Slick, a silky terrier—another yappy little dog—who started trying to get them to go to bed at eight pm.  I thought that was hilarious.  But here’s the thing, Karma is a bitch!  Jojo has now become our 9 o’clock Bum Bum yappy little dog.  She gives us until 9:15, actually, but at that point, she establishes permanent eye contact with Bill and insists it’s bedtime.  So who’s laughing now?  Alice and the ghost of Slick.

So yes, having dogs in the family can be … well … challenging, but I wouldn’t want to live without them.  

We’re considering changing Jojo’s name to Bum Bum, but that hasn’t happened yet.

19 thoughts on “9 O’clock Bum Bum

  1. My small dog is not so pushy, but my cat is. I have requested that he not awaken me before 5 AM, and he’s usually fairly good about it. I have no clocks in the apartment, but you’d better believe he knows what time it is! Occasionally he lets me sleep in until 5:30 or 6 but generally starts rattling around or scratching around 5. Like you, couldn’t live without either of them.

  2. At least you know who is “boss” at your house. I am the servant of cats. Pets can be a major PIA but they are worth it, love and entertainment in a soft furry package.

  3. Our rescue dog “Stormy” of undetermined linage, likes his outdoor insulated dog house and prefers to stay inside “his” fenced kennel. I got up at 5:30 this am (earlier than usual) and forgot to open the blinds so he could see what I was doing. He started barking until I opened the blinds so he could see me 🙂

  4. Have you thought that it might be prudent for the squeaky lobster to become intimately acquainted with the garbage can? Just saying.

  5. I don’t have any pets, but my neighbors do. I know what time it is when the one lets the cats out at daylight to come poo in my yard, and when the other lets the ” yappy little dog” outside to bark for an hour before bringing it back in!

  6. Cats are better, much better. They don’t make yappy noises or squeak loud annoying toys……..

    They just casually stroll up your body, get up in your face and then sniff your eyes to see if you’re awake yet.

  7. You brought back memories of PC Piddle Puppy (guess where that name came from?), Sparky (with a lumpy head), Pluggy (to go with Sparky – what else?), and Chester – how did he wind up with a normal name? As Bob Hope said – thanks for the memories…

  8. We have the cutest little poodle who runs this house on his time line. He allows us to live her so long as he gets his meal on time. I know he has his own clock and needs to be fed on time. Living in AZ we do not change times but he still know when daylight time has arrived.
    Being owned by 15 pound tyrant is a joy that everyone deserves. He has brought untold LOVE and JOY into Out lives.
    Have a great week .. Jan

  9. Nothing can replace our fur babies and their antics! Sitting here watching ours sleep as we await a big wind storm arriving in the Puget Sound later today!

  10. Hilarious! We’ve just returned from a week-long visit with our grand-dog, a miniature dachshund named Elle (She’s blond, legally), and she’s a master of that baleful look. Happy holidays to you and yours, including the bossy pups.

  11. My beagle Ginger’s version of the sqeeky toy is scratching on the back door. She starts doing it every day around 4pm and if you open the door she will not go out. She wants to be fed. She has also figured out she can sometimes trick us and will do this routine again around 6 in order to get another family member to feed her again, not realizing she has already been fed. They are smart !

  12. Aren’t those doggy clocks something?
    We had a 9 p.m. bedtime poodle. Her bed was in the main floor bathroom dubbed Your Room. Whenever there were guests we’d tell her “Go to Your Room.” She did, much to their surprise.
    Now, a Chihuahua. She’s 18 and in assisted living. It’s not easy but we owe her.
    2 dogs spanning 35 years.
    Miraculously, neither have been yappy. (Seeing what you mean about spellcheck’s yappy-happy problem.)

  13. That dogs can tell time is so very true. Our dog, Couper, knows when it is 4:00 p.m. That is when he evening poo potty walk is. He comes to me because I am the evening potty walker, wagging his tail and looking expectant. Going off daylight savings was a problem because 4 became 3, but after a few days he adjusted. My husband and I say all the time that Couper can tell time. So we both read your blog and chuckled a lot this week. Right now, Couper knows the day is too gray to worry about moving—-a good day to sleep in. We had a daschund name Pete before Couper. He knew when 2am was because he liked to go potty out on the frozen lawn in the middle of the winter at that time. I used my husband’s Alaska parka for that venture. And, yes, I was the middle of the night pottier.

  14. Dogs aren’t the only ones who can tell time. I swear that one of my horses must wear a watch. 4 PM on the dot if someone isn’t out there with the evening ration of oats and alfalfa, she’s pacing in front of the corral gate, cursing in horse. The morning feed she’s more flexible with, but “dinner” had better be on time, OR ELSE!

  15. Pets!!! The stories just keep on coming! A few years ago my elder sister and I combined our households and at one point we had 3 Chihuahuas (down to one now, sadly) who could all tell time. They kept trying to edge up the 5:00 pm dinner time too, but that time we could nudge around a bit. Even so we constantly scheduled our lives around the “dogs feeding time”. There was little nudging with the “Greenie” (dog cocaine) time of 7:00 pm however. This was considered sacred time and not to be fiddled with, and all three dogs would gather around my sister with those powerful stares that went from baleful to pleading! My sister’s dog would take herself off to bed in their room around 8:30 and would come back every so often to glare at my sister until she would give up and go to bed too. Pets!! A blessing and a curse! Happy holidays to all, two and four legged!!

  16. The “herd” here has everything timed. It has been 7 am for morning “cookies” from the neighbor, then breakfast, then 4pm “cookies” and dinner. This was our routine for years – the neighbors could set their clocks by the racket! LOL Now, we’ve gotten older and our neighbor has health problems. Several times in the past few weeks, I’ve caught him sitting by the fence IN THE COLD waiting for 20 minutes or so for the dogs to come out. He says he HAS to feed **his** dogs because he knows they are “hungry”. I’m changing the time for loosing the hounds to 9 or 10 am, when it’s had a chance to warm up a bit. Bedtime is another story – Charlie, the wire haired dachshund starts sounding the “10 minute warning” at about 10pm. Woe to Pop (my husband) if he tries to stay up a few minutes past his Charlie imposed bedtime. Our late Heidi (a black and tan dachshund, also known as Queen of the Known Universe), would stroll toward the bedroom, tossing a glance over her shoulder as if to say, “I am going to bed NOW, are you coming or not?” We just took in 2 rescues – supposedly fostering a pair of chihuahuas, more yappy little dogs. They have fallen into the routine for the most part, but have decided that THEY must defend the house – yapping all the way! But, they give us love and laughter and I wouldn’t have it any other way – except mornings when I really want to sleep to 7:30 or later!

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