Yesterday was not a good day in the social media department. I received not one but three separate nasty-grams—communications from people who went out of their way to say what a terrible writer and awful person I am. That’s fine. Everyone is entitled to his or her opinion, but just because they think it doesn’t mean I have to read it or respond.
For the past several months, my spam folder has been alive with AI generated letters that begin by giving me effusive praise for one of my books and inviting me to to participate with their various book clubs — the European Book Club, the Seattle Book Club — and offering me an “opportunity” (for a certain price, of course) to interact with their hundreds or thousands of members who would then post comments on the book in question on the web and thus raise its profile. Hello. Paying people to write positive reviews may not be illegal, but it’s certainly immoral.
When the first one of those came in, I followed up on it. Bottom line, I finally figured out it was a scam. Since then I’ve received dozens of almost mirror image emails about any number of books. Yesterday I hit the wall and wrote back: This is a scam. Shame on you.” Nasty-gram número uno soon followed.
A little later in the day, someone who is one of my regular correspondents let me know that the bio on my Wikipedia page had been altered by an unauthorized individual in a way that was designed to undermine me publicly. That comment has since been deleted, but I know who sent it. It was the same person who sent me an email a month or so ago demanding information that was none of her business. But since the website says I respond, I did so, answering her question honestly and saying that I hoped we could agree to disagree. Evidently not!
As for number three? Yet another woman wrote to express her “dismay” over the misogyny exhibited in The Girl from Devil’s Lake which clearly showed my contempt toward Indigenous and Latina women, claiming that my story had set human rights back decades. That’s when I hit the wall. I did NOT respond. I hit the delete key instead.
So yes, I broke my own rule. I will continue to reply to the SERs—the sharp-eyed readers who point out errors in my books. One of those came in yesterday, too. Someone mentioned that Gelert, the wolfhound mentioned in a poem my father used to read to us, was actually from Wales rather than Ireland, and that I had it wrong in one of my books. I’m going to correct that error as soon as possible, but since all the wolfhounds I’ve ever met were called Irish Wolfhounds as opposed to Welsh Wolfhounds, I can see how I made that mistake. That writer, by the way, received an immediate response expressing my appreciation.
So this is my official notification that, from now on, I will NOT be responding to ALL correspondence. The ones that cross the line and are written with evil intent will be sent into the great beyond of my Spam file.
While my first husband and I were teaching on the reservation, our washing machine was literally struck by lightning. At the time, I told Jerry Janc that if God had wanted me to wash clothes, He wouldn’t have struck the washing machine with lightning. From then on, once a week, we dropped our dirty clothes off at the laundromat in the reservation in Sells once a week and picked it up after school washed, dried, folded, and ironed.
In my book this is the same thing. If God had wanted me to respond to ALL messages, He wouldn’t have given me a delete key.
I absolutely agree with the “delete key” option! There are so many people on the internet who have no filter. The web has been a blessing, but also a curse, in that it distances people from one another. Thus, people tend to think their words have no consequence. I pray you never run afoul of anything more nasty than ignorant words from inconsiderate people. (as the saying goes: “sticks and stones…”) Just hit “delete” and carry on! Bravo!
It’s sad that so much rudeness and downright nastiness has permeated our society. People are entitled to their opinions but some civility needs to be there as well. You are a successful doer which tends to promote jealousy and insecurity in some people.
I think it was Lou Holtz that said “when all is said and done, much more will be said than done”.
Keep up your most enjoyable writing. You have certainly enhanced my (and countless others) life with your books. Rest easy knowing that your hateful critics are probably speaking to themselves rather than you.
Those bad comments happen to all. You are doing the right thing by deleting them. They come from jerks
I am so sorry to hear of your “attacks” – it upsets me to hear. I was one who had emailed you about your books and was amazed to get a reply back from you. It saddens me that your openness has had to be tempered because of those attacks. And the difficult part is that there is no winning in a battle if one chose to take them on.
Please never change the way you are or the way you write.
My wife had an interesting term for what to do with things such as them, put them in the “bit bucket”
You should not have to put up with nastiness. Be sure to block them as well as delete them. The internet has emboldened people to say things they never would in person, I think you are great.
You are doing the right thing. Keep it up
Good plan. Now if you could avoid having to read this crap it would be even better – I don’t have a plan for that stage of the process.
This last week I re-read “The Girl from Devil’s Lake” but must have missed the misogyny. Or else it’s not there? Either way, it was wonderful the second time through also.
Cheers, Ceci
Good for you. From a fan who loves your books and has great respect for you.
I am so sorry that you have to put up with all of that “crap!” I have read all of your books for years…and even reread them. You are a brilliant writer, and since I have lived, or visited most of the places your characters live in, I always feel at home in the settings. I am just reading The Girl from Devil Lake, and there is no misogyny…I know that when I see it….especially with our current administration! (Please excuse my politics!). Just remember how much joy you bring to all of us. Helen Dempsey-Tennent
Good for you, J. A.
with three teenage boys–one of them very untidy–and remains so today, I was fussing about the status of his room. My husband instructed me to close the door–not quite a delete key–but same effect.
We, your fans, know what a wonderful person you are, and no one who knows you would ever think otherwise. However, we also know there are people out there who love to be nasty, just for the heck of it. Best to ignore and delete. Nowhere is it written that you must answer garbage.
Blessing to you and Bill
I, for one, have enjoyed every book you have written in all 3 series. I have gotten my son hooked on Beau.. We are looking forward to his next adventure with his Wolfhound……of what ever origin.
I owned restaurants for nearly 30 years…..wished I had a delete button many times!
?
Oh, man! What kind of sick-o gets his or her jollies out of writing those nasty-grams? Yes, the “delete key” is the best option for such messages. Sort of like the “hang-up” for the many scams that come in by telephone. Usually I can hang up before getting into the conversation, but one time I didn’t realize it was a scam, so when I finally did, I asked, “Does your mother know you are doing this?” The caller was immediately angry, and shouted, “You leave my mother out of this!” So I knew he was–subconsciously, perhaps–ashamed of what he was doing. Another time, once I recognized a scam, I said, “You need to get a REAL job!” and hung up. I think people who feel the need to send you nasty-grams have too much time on their hands, or don’t feel secure about their worth in the eyes of God. If anyone calls you a terrible writer or an awful person, yes, hit “delete,” because WE know better.
Don’t waste your time reading all of those negative reviews.
I love all of your books! One time I wrote you a couple of critiques on a book and you responded kindly, which I appreciated!
I agree. Nasty deserves no reply. Good for you.
God bless your humor and God bless the delete button. Sorry to say that there are people that get up in the morning and think to themself “who should I be wicked and untruthfull to today”. What a sorry life they live. Have loved all your books.
Absolutely right…I agree and I do not waste one precious minute of my short life w/someone who does not have my best interests at heart.
Keep on deleting. You are a great writer and I have read all of your books and when I finish one I eagerly await the next. In my opinion the ones who edit the books should take care of the editing. Another favorite author once had a new book released and there were so many mistakes that I concluded that they printed and sold the draft by mistake. It was awful.
I used to consider the Delete key one of my favorites until I discovered Block.
When I Block, I know it goes into my Spam folder. I figure if my computer can follow directions and put something into Spam, there is no need at all for me to open my Spam folder. Gosh, that has made my life so much simpler and stress-free.
Try it because I LOVE what you write and want to keep your stress at a minimum so you’ll outlive me. BTW, I am 84 also.
I’m totally in agreement with your decision!
There are people who are jerks all over. You do the right thing by blocking them
Your approach is very even-handed and sensible.
I wonder if there is a way for YOU to get notified if someone makes a change to your Wikipedia page.
As others have said, you spend your time interacting with your faithful following. But others who decide that slander and other nonsense are definitely not worthy one iota of your time.