In the mid-fifties, Thelma and Mac McAdams moved to Bisbee, bringing along their two children, Pat and Ted. Their house faced Campbell Avenue, but their back gate was only about half a block from our house on Yuma Trail if I walked there through Mrs. Corbett’s side yard.
Pat and I quickly became fast friends. Because there were so many kids in my family, we usually spent our play time at her house where she had a room all to herself. We spent hours on the carpet in her bedroom playing with her set of Queen Elizabeth paper dolls Incidentally, a few years ago, Pat sent me a vintage set of those paper dolls for my birthday. We were both in Miss Stammer’s fifth grade class where we used an unfolded wire clothes hanger to pass notes back and forth. That was our version of texting!
In high school where we both took journalism, we ended up being co-editors of our school paper, the Copper Chronicle. And during our senior year, we led an insurrection, if you will, passing a petition asking that one of our classmates, who was already married and pregnant with her second child, be allowed to walk through graduation with the rest of our class. That effort was squelched when the Superintendent of Schools called my father and informed him that I was due to be given a college scholarship which I would receive on class night—as long as we stopped passing the petition. We did. The classmate received her diploma by mail, and I went off to college. By the way, I’ve always felt guilty about that. It’s as though my success came from grinding my classmate into the dust.
In high school Pat hit the dating scene. (She wasn’t six feet tall, so boys actually asked her out!) My role was to stand on the sidelines and walk her through whatever drama arose out of those high school romances. Even though we’ve lived on opposites ends of the country most of our lives, we’ve stayed in touch and seen each other through troubled marriages, difficult divorces, and major health crises, including one several years ago where she suffered a stroke and lay on the floor of her garage for almost twenty-four hours before she was able to drag herself into the bedroom, pull a landline phone off the bedside table, and summon help.
At this point, the story is going to take a seemingly sharp detour but bear with me. On to Christmas. For years Jim Hunt, a friend who was a very talented interior designer, was in charge of our family’s Christmas decorations. By the time he was done—a process that started on the Saturday after Thanksgiving and ended just barely in time for Christmas, every flat surface in the house had some delightful touch of Christmas magic. That long ordeal always ended with our whole house, inside and out, looking like a department store window.
The first year after Jim retired, the kids and grandkids took over. They had grown up with Jim Hunt’s decorations, so they knew exactly where things went and how they should look. In a matter of a few hours the house was lit up like … well … a Christmas tree. When Jim stopped by to see the end product, he shook his head sadly and said, “I thought it would look a bit more forlorn.”
But times change. This year, when it was time to decorate for Christmas, the grands were all off in college. Faced with that old adage—If it is to be, it is up to me!—I launched off into it. I had a helper who brought the tree inside and set it up. He also brought the full boxes into the house from the garage and took the empty ones back where they belonged.
I decided to tackle the job one day at a time. On day one, Bill took the ornaments out of the boxes while I hung them on the tree. On day two, he unpacked all the decorative boxes that go under the tree while I placed them there. The next day was devoted to the soft Santas. Day four was spent on the hard Santas, day five went to the angels, and day six to the front porch. Whew! It was a lot of work, but all that decorating doesn’t amount to a hill of beans as far as getting those daily steps is concerned. By the end of those days, I had to practically crawl my way up to the goal line.
As far as decorations go, there’s not something on EVERY flat surface, but there’s enough. And I ended up being particularly proud of the tree, although I have to confess, that when Colt came home for Christmas break, he dropped by and put the angel on top of the tree without needing to use a step stool!
I thought the tree was done, but it turns out I was wrong. Two days ago, a package from Pat McAdams Hall showed up on the front porch. Inside was a wrapped package with a note saying “Seventy years and counting.” Inside was a lovely glass ornament. It features two little girls, a blonde and a brunette, sitting side by side and staring at a Christmas tree. The words written in the margin are these: “It takes a long time to grow an old friend.” Now the ornament is hanging where it belongs, and our Christmas tree really is finished!
And so, although I may be a day late and a dollar short in wishing my readers a Merry Christmas, it’s not too late to send along my hope that they, too, have the blessing of long-term friendships in their lives, not only during the holiday season, but throughout the coming year as well. Because that song we learned in Brownies all those years ago is as true today as it was back then:
Make new friends
But keep the old.
One is silver
And the other gold.
I am blessed to have several long term friends. Although apart, we keep in touch. Would not trade them or the memories we continue to make, for anything.
The song “make new friends” was from Girl Scouting days for me.
A better song about friendship has never been written!
I love your blogs. They take me down memory lane. I never have experienced a Christmas layout like you described, but my little sister does her house up like that. I have had a friend like yours who I have kept in touch with still after all these years. In fact I had Christmas dinner with him, his daughter and a few friends. We met as members of the local swim team, I’m guessing we were in the 10-year-old area. We lost touch for a little while after high school – Vietnam took us to different parts of the world. We reconnected in our local Vietnam Veterans of America Chapter 47 and have enjoyed our company since. It it good to have long-term friends; real friends who stay with you in all the times life throws at you.
Thank you again for stimulating the memories of the past.
How beautiful, Judy! As far as taking the scholarship offer, you did what you thought was right at the time…a decision we make almost every day in one form or another.
Merry Christmas! And hopefully, for us, another great year of writing??
Do you have any idea how much these weekly blogs mean to us? I love this one, for sure! Thank you for sharing your life with us! Happy New Year!???
You always come through. Your weekly blogs either make me laugh or make me wonder, but they always make me feel. I have outlived most of those old friends, but the ones I still have, I cherish.
May the New Year bring you Health and Happiness!
Blessing to you, Bill and your family.
As soon as I readc the title, that song started playing in my mind. I have friends from grade school, high school, and my 30-year Air Force career I still connect with in letters and email, and on Facebook. Seventy years and counting.
Hi Judy
The McAdams family were great neighbors. My mom really missed Mac and Thelma when they moved back to Texas. I am forever grateful to have grown up in Warren and in that neighborhood.
I always admired the sacrifice and dedication that Pat made going back to Cochise College and then commuting to the UofA while completing her degree. Doing this while being a single mother.
Aww! I’m so glad you have the blessing of Pat’s long-term friendship–what a treasure! I missed out on that, having lost track of friends’ addresses with the 26 moves we made in my first 24 years. I did have one high school friend until she died of cancer in 2018. But I’m enjoying Christmas with the friends I’ve made since moving to my current town 25 years ago, and I’m very grateful to God that I have them.
This is a charming story! I have lost track of my very best friend from childhood but about 25 years ago I reconnected with a close high school friend and we email daily. Not having children or family close by, I count my “newer” (20 yrs) friends as family. Happy New Year!
Absolutely beautiful. Your story brought a tear to my eye.
I’m going to call my oldest and bestest friends…
Merry Christmas and Happy 2025!!!
Hah! That song has been running in my mind for the half hour before I read your post! Guess I need to call my school age friend from long ago. We keep in touch but it’s time for an update. Thanks for all you write.
What an wonderful story. That sounds like a lovely ornament. i wish you would have shared a picture. I’d love to see it. I’m one of the fortunate people who has a friend who is my sister from another mister. We met on the school bus when I was 13 and she was 14. We are in our 70’s now and the friendship has seen us through some tough times. It is one of the most precious things in my life. Merry Christmas and a very Happy, healthy New Year to all.
Boy, does that song bring back memories of Brownies! I still have a 70+ year old sit upon made of free oilcloth filled with newspapers and inscribed with my name in nail polish.
My sit-upon was the world’s ugliest. Red with white yarn. The first two sides were okay, but I ran out of patience, and there weren’t nearly enough stitches on sides three and four.
Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year……????from your Northern Arizona Stalker….. Dann?
Amen to that!
That is a great story. Keep it up
Your life sounds familiar. My old friends are slowly passing away and one of my daughters does our holiday decorating. My husband and I are still on the right side of the grass. I still purchase all your books in hand back.
Beautiful story l can’t wait to see what you have written every Friday ,love everything you write.
You have a very interesting name.
A beautiful story full of love. Thanks.
As a tall senior woman who patiently awaits your nx book, I feel graced to hv found yr weekly text! Having lived in CA til 2017 I am now thinking of relocating in my old age to AZ. Also lived in Seattle in 80’s, working on Pill Hill.
Please continue delighting us with yr tales! Happy New Year!
I am grateful for you as a friend from long ago in college days. I was just thinking of you because 12/16/64 was our 60th wedding anniversary. I wore your shoes for our wedding. Thanks from 1 big foot to another.
Now I wear a men’s 9.5 wide tennis shoe for more room and comfort.
Hugs
Wishing you and Bill a joy-filled New Year!
As always your post rings true to me. I just lost my long time (52 years) friend. I am torn and very sad! We were going to cause such havoc in our old age! She made it to 73 way too young.
Loved your story.
How wonderful.
I keep reading chunks of your life. I just finished”After the fire” 20 minutes ago, then opened FB and found this. Lady you have lived a full and blessed life.
I love your blog today! Yes to old friends. They are precious. I have a friend that came with my teacher and her daughter to our school when I was in 2nd grade in a one room school. Yes a one room school Wow our sun just came out! Sorry for going off subject but it has been dark, dreary and foggy all week with rain this morning. Back to friends, still have some from grade school and Junior high. We went clear through high school together. The first of the month we went to OK to celebrate friends from early 70s when we all lived on the Navaho Reservation 60th anniversary! Will be 80 next month so even though we don’t see each other that often old friends are still cherished. Newer friends also. Happy New Year!
Best wishes to you and Bill in 2025. I no longer have a big Christmas tree as I have to haul the decorations up from the basement and then down again after–Dave isn’t able to help. But, we have a little predecorated one that we enjoy.
I have several “gold” friends and treasure them.
I loved your story today and indeed, I have also been blessed with “Old” friends!
Here’s to a new year full of good health, good friends, fun adventures, and great reads!
Cheers!
Thank you for the wonderful thoughts on friendship. I treasure long time friends. Some I don’t see often but when we do, we start back up like no time has past. I was so glad a few years ago to reconnect with my old dear college roommate as about a year later she passed away. And I still get together with a couple of friends from our Bluebird days (!) We continued on together through Campfire and High School where the program was called Horizon Club. Throughout the programs we also sang “Make New Friends”!!
Too bad that student was not recognized and congratulated for completing her education in spite of her situation. I hope I would have had the same feelings at the time.
I don’t have really close old friends anymore, I’ve pretty much outlived them all. The best and closest friend I have remaining is the one I’ve been married to for 59 years. On the other hand, I keep finding new friends that I’ll never meet or really know, thanks to fantastic authors like Judith and the characters they bring to life so vividly that they seem to be real to me and form lasting friendships.
I’ll never stop looking forward to that.
Happy New Year Judith and Bill. Thanks for another great blog.
I’m in my early 80s and I am still making new friends. The best place is to go to workout classes. I can’t get myself to walk a huge number of steps each day. You really have great will power to get in your steps each day.
By attending senior workout classes the men have a chance to meet many women. We usually have 6 to 7 times more women than men.
We spend 30 to 35 minutes of standing exercises and about 15 minutes of chair exercises.
Sigh! Your story was about me and Lorraine. We were friends for 70 years until her passing in 2020, not from COVID, but from a medical foo pah. We were fast friends from the git go when we met at 8 years old. Both moved around but always kept in touch, spending weeks in the summer at each other’s homes. We were busy during the child rearing years but still kept in touch. As we aged, we traveled a lot together on road trips and if I needed to take off for one reason or another, she would drop everything, get a sitter for her dog and away we went. We even planned to share a room when we ended up in an assisted living or nursing home. Recently, I needed someone to go on a trip to my daughter’s in California, then fly home as I joined my husband there, as his health meant flying was better for him. I don’t fly anymore (another story) Where was Lorraine??? Couldn’t find anyone willing or able to help us out. I so miss my “old” friend, for more reasons than one. Unreplaceable treasured friendship.