You’re all familiar with this caution, but here goes: The following contains a discussion of losing a beloved pet and may be disturbing to some individuals. Reader discretion is advised.
Caution number two: This blog post contains some photos. If they do not come through in your emailed version, please go to my website, www.jajanceauthor.com. Locate the word “Blog” and click on that. If the photos still don’t appear, send me a note at jajance@me.com.
Now, cautions aside, here goes.
For two thirds of our marriage, Bill and I have been big-dog people. Within ten days of tying the knot, we brought home two eight-week old golden-retriever puppies, Nikki and Tess, named after Nicola Tesla. Our thinking was that their presence would be a help in blending our two families, and it worked.
A few years later we took in an elderly platinum golden retriever named Mandy and fospiced (A combination of fostering and hospice care) for six months before we learned what we had been told was arthritis was really bone cancer.
After Mandy came a tiny pound puppy named Boney who grew up to be half German shepherd and half Irish wolfhound. He was the bridge between our original Goldens and our next pair—red-dog Goldens that time, Aggie and Daphne, named after Agatha Christie and Daphne du Maurier. By the way, in Boney’s eyes, Daph could do no wrong. She could pull on her ears or tail and he wouldn’t move a muscle. If Aggie came too close to him, she was greeted with growls and bared teeth!
You see how this works: Dogs come into our lives and never stay as long as we want them to. In 2010, with Daph the only dog left in the household, things changed. That’s when we found an abandoned long-haired miniature Dachshund running in the middle of a neighborhood street. After trying unsuccessfully to find her owner, we named her Bella, and she showed us the benefits of dog downsizing.
Once we lost Daph, Bella was lonely, so we went searching for another Doxie and came home with a little gray and white ball of fluff we named Jojo. And once Bella was gone, along came Mary.
Bella and JoJo
Where Bella had been a dignified older-lady of a dog, Jojo was a scamp. I think you can see that in the side-by-side framed portrait of the two of them together. For years Bella had slept in a Mercedes-shaped dog bed. Jojo tore it to pieces within a matter of weeks, and she did the same thing to every dog bed or blanket that followed.
Jojo didn’t need a calendar to know which day it was. On Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings, she parked under the dining room table waiting for our personal trainer to arrive. And she didn’t need a clock to tell what time it was, either. Each day, at 2 PM, on the dot, she would level an unblinking stare in my direction, letting me know it was dinner time. And if I didn’t deliver the goods fast enough, she would grab her most obnoxious squeaky toy and squawk it until I got the message.
In December, seven and a half years ago when Jojo was five, she went out into the back yard at noon looking just fine. Three hours later, when it was time for dinner, she was suddenly a paraplegic. A trip to the nearest pet hospital told us she needed neurosurgery on her back—to the tune of $13,000. Bill and I looked at each other and said, “Well, I guess we know what we’re giving each other for Christmas.”
Her post-surgery recovery period last for two months, with me carrying her in and out to do her duty, but one day late in January she was able to squat by herself, and we were good to go.
Our house has two sets of very steep steps, one leading to the doggie yard and the other to the back yard. We installed dog ramps. Our doggie door was built for large dogs as opposed to one with a three-inch inseam and a bad back. So I became Jojo’s doggie door, letting her in and out several times a day, whenever she caught my eye and let me know she needed to go.
Mary is tall enough to let herself in and out, but Jojo would wait for me to open the door. Except, of course, when she wanted to go out and bark at the dog that lives up the street. Then she could go out the dog door just fine.
On Wednesday night week ago, when I let the dogs out for the last time, Mary was halfway down the ramp when Jojo spotted a bunny lurking behind the fence. She went flying off the steps to chase it. The next morning she was hobbling and having trouble controlling her legs. Another round of surgery wasn’t possible. For one thing, I’m eighty years old now. Caring for her during a two month recover period just wouldn’t be possible, so on Friday of last week we had to have her put down.
We’ve missed Jojo terribly this past week, and so has Mary. Mary has moved her dog bed away from the TV set and now has it positioned between Bill’s and my chairs. Without functioning as Jojo’s doggy door, I’m having to make up the 700 steps that usually came along with that.
But here’s the thing, losing it the ultimate cost of loving, and I wouldn’t change a thing. We loved you Jogee—as we came to call her—and we miss you, but we’re glad we had you for as long as we did.
As for that $13,000 surgery bill? Amortized over seven and a half years, that comes out to only $141 a month—a small price to pay for having that sweet little scallawag in our lives.
JoJo
Sweet story. Rescue dogs have been in our lives and they have all worked out just fine
I know how you feel. There is nothing like a pet to give you love and you will do whatever you can to keep them with you. I’m so happy for your loss.
You loved them well. That’s what we need to do.
I live for my two girls, Miss Annie and Miss Dixie.
Living on a fixed income, there have been times when I skimped on my meals so they could eat what’s best for them.
But without them, I’d be lost.
Aww, my condolences, JAJ, to you and Bill and Mary. Sounds like Jojo had quite the personality. Or would we have to call it DOGality?
So very sorry to hear, but JoJo went across Rainbow Bridge and is now playing and running free. She is watching over you and Bill and Mary.
A wonderful story, though, of the companions you have had over these many years.
What a sweet, sweet story of all your doggie babies! Its better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all ????
When I was growing up on an Iowa farm, I had a little rat terrier who looked just like the RCA Victor dog. I named him Spot. He spent most of his time under the corn crib trying to catch rats. That was his job.
One day he was hit and killed by a car. Grandpa buried him under an apple tree. That tree had the best apples after that.
I never had another dog. He was a part of growing up.
The loss of a family dog is always shattering. Know you did the right
thing! I still mourn my first golden, Barley.
Awesome indeed.
So sorry for your loss. Most of us know what it is like to lose a beloved pet who is a member of your family.
I had cats. Cats have issues like thyroid problems, like urinary problems , other stuff. We also contributed to vet’s retirement over the years . But the pets loved us and we loved the cats. Worth every penny. You did the right thing!!!
When I was an Emt, on my days off I help my friend who was veterinarian. The saddest thing we did was putting a pet to sleep so that they would not suffer no more. The animals would look at us and often we would have tears. But no more pain.
I understand. Have always had family fur babies, dogs, cats, guinea pigs…and the inevitable sometimes comes with making those very hard and painful decisions. We had a dog named JoJee (combination of my sister’s and my middle names). And nearly a year ago this month, my sweet love cat Frederico had some kind of seizure, and after driving from the coast to Vancouver, he did not make it. It broke my heart, and because of the pain, I decided I needed to take care of someone. Within 2 weeks I got Obi and then Momo from our animal shelter. One was an orphan; the other had been abandoned. We’re all taking care of each other now.
Sorry you lost one of your fur babies. It is hard losing them as they become an important part of your family. I had to let my cat Shoni go over the rainbow bridge 6 1/2 years ago and miss her every day. I got a couple year old kittens a few months later and love them to pieces,,,but I still miss my Shoni.
Sorry for your lost, they are like family. Lost our beloved Jax last month, spent over $2000 trying to save him, but it wasn`t so. Couldn`t be without a dog so we rescued another one and the joy he is bringing us.
Judy:
my wife and I have had a dozen or more kitties during the (nearly) 51 years of our marriage, and we ALWAYS hate to lose one of them. In the previous two years we’ve lost one each year (they were both over 20, so it was not too surprising).
Our daughter had a Tibetan Mastiff (can you say B I G ??) who survived to 13 which, I gather, is pretty amazing for a large breed.
So, we’re not unfamiliar with the feelings that you’re having these days. Our condolences to both of you.
Fred
PS:
FYI, I’ve recently become aware of the man called “The Supervet”, Noel Fitzpatrick who runs a veterinary orthopedic practice in Surrey, England. Having binged on the TV shows based on his practice, I can say I’ve seen him do spinal work like what you had done with Jojo. It is pretty amazing!
I’m so sorry to hear of your losing your JoJo. I am a dog owner of many years, having gone through those difficult decisions too. I’m not a parent, so those losses were my children too. At our ages we have to consider whether or not to get another pet, would it be fair to them if our lives didn’t last long enough for them. I don’t want to have to make that decision, but will someday as my doggie (Mandy) is 14. They are such wonderful life companions, they give so much and ask for so little. My heart aches for you. Thank you for sharing the dog stories and photos too. I can see the scamp, really.
in 2009 my husband took to his tv chair (end state Cancer) and he sent me to the Humane Society to find another dog. We had always had large dogs. I stopped to talk to a friend I knew who volunteered there and she was carrying a towel wrapped very small dog who was recovering from being a runaway/car critter after surgery. He opened his big brown eyes and looked at me over a very skinny body that had been shaved. He was a 3yr old Shitzu and I took him home, put him on the floor by Bob who didn’t laugh. Just had bad comments but he called him Buster. Life went on but within a month I would come home from work and find Buster under Bob’s right hand. The now shaking one. When Bob died in bed Buster was a mess. So I did a strange thing. Bought a Shitzu puppy who was the size of a baked potato and named him Bentley. They are both gone now but my family and friends always bring their dogs for me to love on!
Sending hugs and prayers for comfort. It is true it’s hard to lose one of our furry friends!
I’m so very sorry for your loss. I know the heartbreak when one of our pets goes on ahead. I love the pictures. Such an adorable face! Wishing you peace and comfort in your many memories of your sweet JoJo.
So sorry to hear of Jojo’s crossing the Rainbow Bridge. We have always had two furbabies at a time; one time we had four. We have never called them “rescues” we say they have rescued us. Jojo tearing up Bella’s bed brought to mind a torn up bed but that time Twisty tore his own bed up. We went on vacation and boarded the babies at our vet. Twisty had his own bed like Bella and wouldn’t sleep anyplace else so we took it to the vet. When we picked them up, they forgot the bed. We mentioned it and they came back with a black garbage bag full of shredded foam and bits of material!
What a beautiful story! We have a Shih Zu called Jake, he’s just like your JoJo. He’s getting older now but still a little hooligan!
All dogs go to heaven.
(sitting here weeping). The great garden writer Henry Mitchell said that the pain of losing a dog is the price we pay for the great joy of having them in our lives. So true.
Ceci
thank you…
every Monday morning, without fail, my cocker Mollie would drag all the towels and pillows out of her kitchen crate and drag them into the living room to, I suppose, air them out…not on Tuesday or any except Monday….
I’m both sad and happy for you both, plus Mary. I have had the pleasure of wonderful pets and the feelings with letting them go. We are lucky to be able to love and care for our little families of four legged children.
I am so sorry for your loss. To me, your story is again evidence of your big heart.
I want to let your readers know that if they cannot see the pictures, clicking on the comment space and then scrolling back up to the story always works. For some reason the pictures appear when I do that, but otherwise they don’t. Weird.
I bet I am not the only one of your fans who is weeping right now as I read of your joy with Jojo and then the pain of letting her go to her final rest. The pain will eventually subside and you can smile at all the wonderful memories. All of your pets are in doggie heaven right now, comparing notes on all their times with you & Bill.
So true, Janice…I’m crying and remembering all our precious pets who are no longer with us in body but definitely in spirit.
They are with us for far too short a time. When our mother and daughter labs got older, we were happy to do whatever we could to make their lives pleasant and fun. Raven, the mom, was having a hard time going up and down steps, so Paul would stand by the steps and “fly” her down. Once she started to step off the top before he was ready and he had to scramble to keep her from falling. She KNEW he would be there for her. She lived to be 16 1/2. Chuar, daughter lived to be 16 and toward the end she was really picky about eating, so we’d cook for her twice a day. She lived to be 16. We have a smaller dog now, a heeler mix, but I still miss them a lot.
Oh, JA, what bittersweet memories you have evoked. I feel your pain. Our mini-dachshund, Duchess, was born in Saudi Arabia when my husband worked as an electrical engineer there and she came back to the States to live with us for 17 years. She was a tough sweet girl. Her back surgery came in her 8th year and helped her so much that she was with us for another 7, hunting and roaming our PA acreage.
At my age (soon to be 76) these memories are precious. Thank you so much for sharing in your blog. You are the best!
My family raised dachshunds. We lived on a farm. One summer we had five adults, thirteen puppies, two German Shepherds. and the usual assortments of barn cats. The matriarch of the cree lived to be 17 or 18 before dying of cancer. All the dogs were AKC registered under the Caduceus Farm name. Dad was a small town country doc.
I joined the Air Force and was stationed in Japan. We had a JKC registered female named Sugar after the first Sugar. She developed lower back problems and recovered without surgery. She watched our two young ones like a hawk, and lived strawberries. I watched her walk around our small patch. She woul sniff and then poke her nose in to pick a ripe berry. She developed cervical problems and had to be put down when she was six. We haven’t had another doxie.
My favorite comment about the breed, “more bark per pound than aby dog aroind.”
This brought tears to my eyes. We have only had two dogs, one a tiny poodle who lived to 10 years old and was my best friend for years especially before I married. Then we had a Sheltie that followed our children every where, but one day he went out of the yard by way of an opening in the fence he had found and ran out and a lady ran over him. What followed still stays with me. We have always had cats besides the dogs. I can’t even tell you how many, since it’s been over 52 years since our first one. They have always been strays that found their way to our home, people think out of town you can just drop off cats . We lost our last cat about 7 years ago and couldn’t think of owning another but then our neighbors cat had kittens and she called to see if we were ready for new fur babies. We went and looked and fell in love, they were brand new. After a few weeks we would bring them to our home for an hour to get them used to our home and at 8 weeks to the day we brought them home. We have a Black and White, Marco and a Calico, Minnie. We decided not to let them go outside as we lost so many to probably either Hawks or Coyotes. We want to have them for a long time and since they don’t know the outside they don’t know what they are missing. We have a huge window they watch the bird feeders and the Deer that go by each day during the Summer. So I understand your loss and the cost of surgery. We just spent over $4,000 on Marco for Bladder Stones. They are worth every penny and I loved your story so much. This is long so I am sorry for that, but it’s nice to know others have gone through things we have.
So understand your sadness. These wonderful furry creatures find a way into your heart as no others can. You care for them in every way imaginable, love them beyond words and cherish every moment you share with them. Each time that dreaded time comes you tell yourself, “no more”. But then you find another furry soul to warm your heart.
I feel your heartache. Thank you for sharing your and JoJo’s story.
Really sorry for your loss! Loved your blog today and your heart sharing.
Through the years (I’m73) we have had a plethora of special ones, grateful rescue ones ( you know what I mean), strays who gave birth, gifts, and of course those so special that words fail. It’s sad that we “out live” them sometimes…… I still tear up when thinking about Sadie, a rescue beagle mix who died over 5 yrs ago. May we all do more to rescue and pamper these little sweeties. Even if it’s volunteering at a shelter to help a traumatized guy go to a good home.
Love ? and Hugs ? to you!!
What a beautiful picture of JoJo-
And what a mark she made on her world-
A scallywag, one who would destroy every pet bed known to man, one who would demand to be let out even though she could perfectly well move out on her own when motivated-
She lived life on her own terms, and brought joy to those around her-
We who know her through this precious Blog will never, ever forget her-
Makes me laugh and sniffle a bit….love dogs but our time with them is way too short…
Our exact sentiments. We’ve had as many as 13 to 20 rescues in our home at one time and over our 32 year marriage have had a lot more. We have loved and lost them all. I still have Jack our poodle/bijon freze buy my husband is on the other side now. I can just see how he was received by all our animal babies when he crossed the rainbow Bridge! We need to remember that they don’t die, they just change. They are young again and free of pain and incapacity. They are happy and are with us constantly. I am also thankful for every one of their presences in our life.
Thank you, Judy, for sharing your love and heartbreak with us. Beautiful pictures!
RIP sweet Jojo–we all feel the loss of you. “Dogs are not our whole lives but they make our lives whole.” And leave big holes in our hearts when they leave.
Love to you and Bill and Mary, xx, Annie
Sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is like losing a member of your family as they are truly members of your family. Dave and I are petless now as Dave uses a walker to help with his balance–just isn’t safe for us or the pet.
You would be surprised at how quickly Mary and Jojo both adjusted to Bill’s walker.
I know the pain of making that decision Big hugs to both if you!!!
God bless you both. Dogs are so special. My Mort is 13 and having back/hip issues but is a trooper. He has his 2 yo brother Louie to keep him young.
Rainbow bridge will be full of laugher, barking, nips and yips.
Sending hugs from my dog family to yours.
What a beautiful tribute. They are so worth it. I’m sorry for your recent loss. It’s always so tough.
Celeste in Taos
How well I know what you have gone through and still are. I’ve lost count ( or just don’t want to go there) of how many dogs and horses I’ve lost over my82 years. The pain is worth the joy these beings bring to our lives. Our Suzie Corgi is basically on hospice care right now at 13 years old. It breaks my heart on the “bad” days when she won’t eat or wobbles on our outings; then the next day she’s perky and eating again. It’s an emotional roller coaster, but, as pointed out by you and myself, well worth it. We are so grateful for every good day she has. When the bad days outweigh the good days, she will go to the Rainbow Bridge and wait with all the others. My condolences to you two and bravo for your loving care for all your dogs through the years. Some say they’ll never go through that pain again. My take on that is my heart loves dogs and there are too many out there needing my love. There will be another one after a short break.
I’m sorry for loss of JoJo. Pets are family.
Your comments are ALL appreciated.
So sorry you lost your little Jojo. It’s always hard to lose one of our fur-children. Still, the love we have with them is worth the pain of their loss.
Agree that though it’s hard to lose them, it’s so worth all the joy. Your dogs have been so lucky to be part of your family! Keep a close eye on Mary, we had 2 sister dogs and when one passed, the remaining one had to have extra attention for a while, sounds like that’s already the happenjng. I’d love to see a picture of Mary.
I am happy to see the number of people who have taken in rescue dogs and cats. They deserve special thanks for helping those animals live happy lives with a family. No animal should have to live in a cage.
I am so sorry for your loss.
I enjoyed your story and can sympathize with you having to have a couple dogs and cats put to sleep. We miss them but wouldn’t change a thing for all the love they gave us.
I think anyone with pets totally understands your pain. Im so sorry.
I’m very late.reading tbis. I was driving home from vacation on Friday and just realized that I hadn’t read the latest blog. I too am a dog person, still a biggish dog person. As any long term dog person, I too have had to make that terrible decision. Latest was 1 1/2 years ago for my 14 yo Catahoula mix due to brain cancer. It is never easy and always leaves a hole in your heart. Grief is the price we pay for that unconditional love. I guess it must be worth it tho. I still have two dogs, plus three cats and three hotses. You have all my sympathy.
Well, you warned me; I read it anyway and now I have tears in my eyes. I’m so very sorry for your loss. My husband and I have had many wonderful cats over the years, we had to put our last one . Roxy, down in 2020 due to lymphoma, a huge loss that I still feel. I now get my “pet fix” from my neighbor’s Papillon, whom I love dearly and see daily.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Just in the last couple of years I’ve had to say goodbye to my geriatric ward of rescue doxies. It’s hard and it just hurts. But I’ll tell you, some things are supposed to be hard, and hurt. I hope I never NOT grieve saying good bye to a loving companion. Take care.
Totally different topic: In the 80s (after a couple of Beau books) I remember you giving a lecture in Seattle about how you write mystery novels. It was incredibly inspiring, and every time I see your blog, I remember how much I enjoyed seeing you in person
I hope this gives you some comfort. I have passed it on to dozens and dozens of friends and strangers for all sorts of species — all companions loved to the end.
“We who choose to surround ourselves
with lives even more temporary than our
own, live within a fragile circle;
easily and often breached.
Unable to accept its awful gaps,
we would still live no other way.
We cherish memory as the only
certain immortality, never fully
understanding the necessary plan.”
? Irving Townsend
Thank you,Sandy. Just read this after another breakdown missing my little Suzie Corgi. No matter how many dogs and horses I’ve lost over my 82 years, it’s never east with any of them. I’ll be okay and will rescue again. Just need a break to recover from this loss.