Happy Step-a-versary

Today, May 30th is my seventh Step-a-versary, and this week my phone reported that I had crossed the magic number of walking half of the world’s circumference.  Did I have brains enough to take a screenshot of that when it showed up?  No, I did not.  You’re just going to have to take my word for it.

Actually, I may have started walking somewhat earlier than that using a now long-deceased Fitbit, but May 30, 2017 is the  first day my phone’s pedometer app chimed in, and since the phone is what keeps a running total, the Fitbit count bit the dust shortly thereafter.

Walking is what I do for me.  I’m very fortunate to have a life and a job that makes it possible for me to carve out time to walk every day.  Mary and Jojo aren’t particularly thrilled about it, but as long as they’re fed on a regular basis, they tolerate that peculiarity.

This week my email includes notes from two women whose life histories in many ways mirror my own.  Why is it that so many smart young women, myself included, manage to make such bad choices in spouses the first time around?  That’s why I maintain that that little book of poetry is probably my most impactful.  There are far too many folks out there who are living their own versions of After the Fire.

The book tells the story of my alcohol-doomed first marriage.  My entire mystery writing career didn’t begin until after I filed for and obtained a divorce in 1980.  And the truth is, I wouldn’t have had this astonishing second crack at life without having endured the first one.

Believe me, this second time around, steps included, is way better than the first one.

So thank you for that.

27 thoughts on “Happy Step-a-versary

  1. So true, regarding those early bad choices. Some of us have to ‘learn the hard way’, but the freedom that comes when we take time to learn, heal, and come into our own, is worth the challenges, in my opinion. Something so liberating about facing our fears and taking steps into the life we help create. Congratulations on your 7-versary of walking 10,000 a day. I believe it’s true as I’ve been following you and know you’re a straight forward truth teller. Celebrating with you and am inspired.

  2. Lucky I made a good choice 65 year’s ago. Coming up on our 66th anniversary in September.

  3. Happy 7th Step-a-versary, and many more.

    Like many of those smart young women, my first choice wasn’t good, but it wasn’t bad either. It lasted 30 years, It would not have lasted 30 days otherwise. However, I choose not to chance a repeat. I am very happy answering to no one but myself. Too independent by far.

    • Dianne, I thought I’d chosen wisely, but was proved wrong after 17 years. I’ve decided to not try a repeat. I’m also too independent. Can read Judy’s books in bed while eating popcorn and no one will complain. 🙂

  4. As a devoted reader of your books, I am so glad your life took the path it did. I think we all have paths we wish we had not taken, but if we are happy with the person we are now maybe we wouldn’t be that person without those. Thank you for entertaining my brain so well. I don’t even think thank you is enough but that’s all I have.

  5. Starting over does not have to be a bad thing. You took that leap and your life has taken a decidedly great turn.
    Congratulations on the steps mark. Quite a mark!

    • May 30th, was an anniversary for me too. Not nearly as impressive as seven years of walking 10,000 steps every day, but it’s been one year since I got my new hip. I have no idea how many steps or miles I’ve logged over the years, but started jogging in about 1974. Did that for 25 years, then came walking, which I’ve been doing every since. I have to use a walker now, the kind with four wheels and a seat in the middle but still get out four times a week for a couple miles. I also use my phone to keep track of steps. One thing about hip replacement and walking for me was that the length of my stride increased about four inches. I suppose that’s a positive.
      Judith’s bolg instantly reminded me of a great song by Old Blue Eyes … Frank Sinatra… called second time around. “Love is lovelier the second time around, just as wonderful with both feet on the ground….”. It goes on “there are those who bet love comes but once and yet, I’m oh so glad we met the second time around….”.
      I’m in the first group. I met the sweetest girl ever 60 ago in a church in Taipei, Taiwan. We’ve been married for 59 years this year. But, I tip my hat to those who have had the courage to try again and have found happiness. God bless you every one
      Finally, thanks to Judith for helping keep me inspired to keep on getting out to get more steps in. So, those of you who have not started walking, start. Those who have, keep it up. And of course, those who write books, keep writing. That really helps keep us going.

  6. Congratulations! This milestone is WAY beyond impressive-
    You are inspiring me to get moving again- I have always loved to walk, and walked a lot- However, when the pandemic hit, I went into hibernation mode- I am just now beginning to break out of that- Your steps are part of my motivation-
    Thank you!
    Thank Heavan for second chances, in marriage and other parts of life-
    The first experience, while horrible, can teach us how to have an exponentially
    better experience the second time around-

  7. God Bless you!
    I’ve also been through the disastrous first marriage, so I understand. Not an alcoholic, but physically, mentally and emotionally abusive. (#2 was the alcoholic). But I now have been married to a wonderful guy – be 32 years mid-June.
    Thanks again for your posts.

  8. First time? Try second; third; fourth AND fifth rounds of choosing such “wonderful” marriage partners, but anyway.

    Mary and Jojo? Dogs, cats, hamsters?

    Congratulations on your half way around the world, I can no longer walk 25 steps without my back seizing up and freezing on me; so I live through you.

    I first found you right after your second book came out; both autographed copies, in a little-now-defunct book store in Pullman, Washington, and bought them for my now late-mystery reading mama: two things, 1. If my sister and I could have bought her stock in a publishing company based on the number of books she read every day, she and I would be dirty-rotten-stinking-filthy rich right now, and 2. mama was so particular about the mysteries she read, that if either the sis or I recommended a book she didn’t like, she made us pay…. a lot. J.P. had her sold, and of all of your offerings, he by far is still my favorite.

    Best Blessings to you and yours and many more happy steps around the earth.

    • Mary and Jojo are long-haired miniature dachshunds. I’ve had dogs all my life and these are my first house-training failures. So our lovely carpets are covered with pee-pads.

  9. All experience hopefully leads to better experience. To all those who don’t learn from experience, think again!!!

  10. First was divorce for selfish reasons. Second was great but ended up widowed. Third was my cross to bear. Alcohol, Separating me from family and friends behind my back, control freak, verbal abuse. For 15 years I let myself be beaten down emotionally. When I finally decided I’d had enough his health deteriorated to him needing 24 hour care for 3 years before his passing. My conscience wouldn’t let me bail out when that happened. The things that kept me hanging in there those difficult years was a barn full of horses and a yard full of dogs. The fourth has been a God-send for 20 years now. He just survived a serious heart attack and I’m so grateful for the wonderful medical care he had this past week to save his life. I am blessed.

    • Last night we spent six hours–ten PM to four AM– in an ER where we learned Bill has pneumonia. I, too, am very grateful for medical care. He’s much better today.

      • I know the stress and worry. Overlake? That’s where they saved Terrance’s life. The are awesome and so caring. I hope you and he are feeling some relief. God bless.

      • So sorry to hear this. Best wishes for a speedy and uneventful recovery. Bill will feel all the warmth of all of us well-wishers coming his way. Best wishes for you, his best cheerleader, too.
        xx, Annie

  11. WooHoo! Congratulations on your walking milestone. After the Fire touched me deeply. Prayers that Bill has a speedy recovery.

  12. You began counting on my 68th birthday! I will not forget that, the former Memorial Day but alas, that has changed. Keep on trucking…

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